Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
