everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize