How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Randomize
