This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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