I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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