somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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