Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize