did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
