Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
