i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
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