so that wasnt chicken after all
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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