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• (619): View more from California

  That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.

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• (760): View more from California

  There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.

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  21 Reasons You’ll Be Forever Alone

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (440): View more from Ohio

  sarcasm needs its own font

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot

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• (209): View more from California

  I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.

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  23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (651): View more from Minnesota

  I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck

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• (516): View more from New York

  Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works

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