I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.