Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
