Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
