week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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