but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
