They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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