are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
