i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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