i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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