Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
