uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
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