dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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