So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize