i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
