There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
