im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Sext me about skeletons
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
