I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
babies were throwing up all over the place
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize