epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize