Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
