is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
