Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
