just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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