He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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