So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize