Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Randomize