We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
