I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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