i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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