I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize