I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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