are you still at the devil's house?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize