There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
God I need to hump something, right now.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
