Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
