next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
