I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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