I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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