I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
