I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
