i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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